The Single Change That Made a Difference: How I Overcame Post-Work Tension Through an Surprising Find in the Loft

One often feel as tense as a wound-up clock after work. My shoulders grow tense, my breath turns fast and shallow. Usually, the sound of my laptop lid slamming shut used to lead to the squeak of a cork pulled from a bottle of red, the wine hastily sploshed into a glass, that initial sip marking the end of the workday.

Later, a few months ago, I came across my now-adult son’s old school recorder up in the loft. Curious, I blew into it, instantly reminded of the time it was the bane of my life – his daily practice a violent assault on my eardrums, the sharp sounds echoing in my mind long after he slept.

Instead of throwing it away, I brought it downstairs, together with a beginner’s songbook. Growing up, I was the least musical child ever. I’d had recorder lessons at infant school, but never had the opportunity to learn other instruments.

Searching online for recorder tutorials, I viewed many kid-friendly YouTube clips, and printed out a fingering chart. I searched “easiest recorder tunes”, and was thrilled when I managed to knock out a passable Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Yes, a typical young child could learn it quickly, but as a tone deaf, impatient and stressed 51-year-old, it seemed like a major triumph.

My son asked what the hell I was doing (and please could I stop), but I persevered – I enjoyed the sensation the recorder gave me. My inability to remember anything forced me to focus on the music sheet, and painstakingly copy the finger positions. My breath calmed, I was focused, and after nailing that initial shaky melody, I felt euphoric. I could play an instrument.

Now, after some months, I can handle other children’s songs and a decent Ode to Joy. Sure, my timing is rubbish, and I must jot down note names, but for me, it’s not about skill or being a musician – it’s purely about the joy it provides and the fact I can’t think of anything else when I am playing.

I learned that few kids play the recorder today, which was no doubt music to parents’ ears, yet it made me wistful for my school years, and my son’s childhood.

I try to pick up my recorder every evening after work as my first activity, and during those 20 minutes, I escape into my own realm. Afterward, I feel totally energised and uplifted.

My friends find it amusing, yet a therapist friend informed me that I was reducing stress, and boosting mental skills, such as memory and auditory processing, which is invaluable at my time of life. And in terms of my day-to-day wellbeing, it’s a real “ode to joy” indeed.